Since I recently got
hitched, and have all the photos from the big day, I thought it would be fun to
start a weekly series
sharing my favorite images and memories, and maybe a few tips and resources
along the way. This is the fourth installment. If you're planning a wedding,
make sure to check out "The Credits" at the end. Enjoy!
My husband and I both agree: Our favorite part of our
wedding day, hands down, was the ceremony.
The weeks, days and hours leading up to the wedding were
full of anxiety and stress. And a couple things went awry during the reception.
But I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, or a hint of exaggeration, that the
ceremony was perfect.
Since the ceremony is where the marrying actually happens, it
was important to me that it be more than a flash in the pan. More than 10
minutes. More than a quick “We will,” “I do” and kiss! Short and sweet works for
some people, but not for me. We brides and grooms spend so much time and money
on the party, but I believe just as much attention should be given to the part
where two people pledge their love and commit their futures to each other. That’s
what everyone is there to witness and celebrate, right?
And since I’m a writer, I insisted on crafting the ceremony myself. It was quite the undertaking, and took about a week of serious, nose-to-the-grindstone work, though I was thinking about it and researching ideas and readings for much longer. A Practical Wedding was very helpful in this regard (the blog offers great guides for writing your ceremony, as well as samples for traditional and non-traditional ceremonies), though I did do a bit of general poking around the internet, too.
I didn’t want a boilerplate ceremony, with names subbed into
a standardized form. I wanted something unique, thoughtful, personal, romantic.
Sweet is a given, but a little silly keeps people on their toes. Most
importantly, I wanted it to be a reflection of GT and I, and our love.
We had our longtime friend, Ryan, serve as the officiant. GT
has known Ryan since junior high, when they met at church youth group. I ended
up meeting Ryan at church, too, but a few years later, in high school. Ryan was
the perfect choice to lead our ceremony since he’d known us for more than a
decade, separately and together. It was his first time officiating and he did
an incredible job. Even though I had written most of the words he spoke, it
still felt special. He brought the ceremony to life.
Other dear friends took part by giving readings: “Love” by Roy Croft and “How Falling in Love is like Owning a Dog” by Taylor Mali. We included
a handfasting ceremony—which served as our “expression of intent”—and used
Coast Guard line to, literally, tie the knot. Since we’re winos, we also performed
a wine blending ceremony, using two of our favorite red and white varietals. We
wrote our own vows, of course, but got our friends and family involved by
including a community vow of support as well.
The whole ceremony felt surreal, like floating on a cloud.
It also zipped by (as weddings do). But for those 30 minutes or so, I felt truly
joyful and bursting with love. Just how you should on your wedding day.
Now, a few (or a lot) more photos, if you’d like to see…
Our family and the wedding party walked in to “93 Million Miles” by Jason Mraz and “Ho Hey” by The Lumineers, respectively.
I walked down the aisle to “Come to Me” by Goo Goo Dolls.
I love the symbolism and beautiful words of commitment in hand-binding rituals and it added a bit of formality to an otherwise untraditional ceremony. I pulled from a variety of sources (and cultures) to create the handfasting script but I couldn’t have planned this: While our officiant read the words, “These are the hands that will wipe away the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and tears of joy” I was overcome with emotion and started to cry. On cue, GT pulled a tissue from his pocket and handed it to me! Everyone started to laugh and it created a wonderfully sweet memory, and a perfect picture of the man I was marrying.
We exited the ceremony to the song “Best Day of My Life” by American Authors.
THE CREDITS
BRIDE'S STYLE: Theia Wedding Dress
and Untamed Petals Aimee Sash,
both from Lovely Bride Los Angeles
| Alfani
Women's Kyrah Wedge Sandals in Dusty Rose (looks like they are no
longer available) | Necklace and bracelets made by bride | Gemstone
Dangle Earrings by Delezhen
'MAIDS' STYLE: Dresses from ModCloth, LuLu's and Express (all no longer available) |
Necklaces and Earrings from Francesca's
GROOMSMENS' STYLE: Pink Check
Dress Shirt and various purple ties from Men's Wearhouse | Perry Ellis
Linen Pants in Natural Linen | "Honeymoon"
Lavender Argyle Socks from Argoz
| Shoes and belts their own
FLORALS: Modern
Bouquet
RENTALS: Platinum Party Rentals
ARCH: Built by Bride’s father (helpful DIY arch/chuppah tutorial here)
AISLE: Potted Lavender provided by Bride's mother
RUG: Magical Thinking Mirrored Medallion Handmade Rug from Urban Outfitters
MAKEUP (Cheriene) and HAIR (Nicolette): Beauti on the Go
RUG: Magical Thinking Mirrored Medallion Handmade Rug from Urban Outfitters
MAKEUP (Cheriene) and HAIR (Nicolette): Beauti on the Go
PROGRAMS: Exquisite Artistry from Wedding Paper Divas
WINE BLENDING: Blush Wine Glass and Mini Gray-Green Decanters from Crate and Barrel
VENUE: Martin Johnson House
WINE BLENDING: Blush Wine Glass and Mini Gray-Green Decanters from Crate and Barrel
VENUE: Martin Johnson House
PHOTOGRAPHY: heidi-o-photo
I wrote our ceremony too, and looking back I'm really happy I took the time to do so. It was a more traditional Jewish ceremony, but not too traditional since the boy isn't Jewish. I actually have the whole thing written out in on recaps if you happen to be curious, but I would definitely agree with you that if possible it makes more sense to make the ceremony more personal to you.
ReplyDeleteI would imagine writing a traditional Jewish ceremony would be difficult! Since our ceremony was less traditional, I had the freedom to do whatever I wanted in a sense. But it was still a lot of work because I wanted it to be PERFECT! Haha. It is definitely special though, when you can have the ceremony tailored to you and your partner... While not for everyone, writing it yourself is a great way to make sure it's exactly what you want.
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